just breathe

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waiting sucks September 17, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — maurianne @ 3:39 pm

Ever been so close to getting out of a rut you can almost feel it. That is where I am at. I have applied for multiple jobs in….surprise surprise…Salt Lake City of all places. I am a bit shocked myself. I never thought I would actually find a job here for me again. In fact, I was ready to pack my bags and take a traveling gig. To be honest I was ready to do that last month, but my hospital in Vegas needed me for practically the whole month. But last week I was contacted about a couple of jobs open in Utah. I’ve applied, and now I am just waiting to hear back. The waiting is killing me. I want things to change. I am ready for a change. But I am stuck waiting. It sucks. Oh well.

I am so excited for the fall, and am ready to make plans. I am ready for colors to change, leaves to fall. I am ready for a slight chill in the air and warm foods and drinks to accompany it. I am ready for haunted houses, and costumes, and scary movies. I love the fall season, and to be able to spend it in Utah will be fun. That is if everything works out. If none of those jobs pan out, it is off to Washington for 3 months for me. Not that I would complain about that either. I am just ready for an adventure. It’s been a really hard year for me, all of it has been devoted to helping family and people around me. I don’t know who I am anymore, and I hate it. I have a hard time being social because I feel so drained. I have nothing left to give…not even my company. I hate to admit it, but is the truth. And I appreciate my wonderful, patient friends who are letting me run my anti-social streak for awhile. I just need time and a decent, steady job for while. Oh and to spend a little less time in Las Vegas. I’m just not sure if that is possible. I just hope it is.