I had dinner with friends tonight. It’s become a pretty regular Sunday night routine to have Sunday dinner’s together. I am used to being on the planning and cooking end, but with the Halloween party we threw the night before, I just didn’t have the energy to think ahead to Sunday. Oh hey! Let me back up to the Halloween party. It was a blast. I was so happy to see all of my friends in one room. Some friends I hadn’t seen in 5-6 moths, and one friend it had been years. I was smiling so much my jaw hurt. Friendship is precious to me. My family is broken, and I mourn that fact everyday. If it weren’t for my friends, I would have nothing, and I treasure my friends so very much. Heavenly Father has truly blessed me, so when I push for a party it is out of love. I want a chance to show my love. That also ties into Sunday night dinners and alla that. So anyways, tonight was different. Different setting, different planner and cook. Not that I mind. I would have enjoyed it completely had my feelings not been a bit bruised at the beginning. I was introduced to a roommate, but the introduction was awkward. Various words were thrown out. Friend, sort of roommate, person that’s just around, she’s uh…whatever…just there. They joke, but in my mind that kind of hurt. Why couldn’t they just say good friend and leave it at that? Am I too clingy? Should I step back for a bit? I’ve been so grateful to them for including me in their family, and I’m probably just being silly. They really are some of the best people I know, and they would never dream of hurting me.
Chicken Soup October 23, 2006
Not for your soul, I’m talking real chicken soup. I had a nice homemade bowl of it. I was walking in the door with it last night, and tried to close the door with my leg. Well, I got caught off balance and chicken soup ended up all over my front door, my carpet, and wall. Trying to pick up bits of rice at midnight is not my idea of a good time. And now my apartment smells like soup. Although I can’t really complain about that. People will just walk in and think I’m a good cook. Or I could lure in guys with the smell of homemade cooking. Cool.
So my weekend was pretty uneventful. I saw the Prestige. Awesome movie! I highly suggest it. And I also saw Nightmare before Christmas in 3D. That was a blast. Saturday was the last day of the farmers market for this year. So of course I had to say my farewells. : ( I helped make a raspberry lemon cheesecake, and observed the making of raspberry jam. Sunday was good. I made it to Sacrament, I felt to sick too make it to everything else. I also had an appointment with my bishop. It was good. He is not thrilled about my plans for traveling ultrasound, so we’ll see. I’ll meet with him again in 2 weeks and I’ll talk to him more about that. So I dunno. I’m confused (as always) about my next steps. I was planning on putting in my 2 weeks mid November but now I need to do a bit more soul searching first. *sigh* The rest of my Sunday was nice. I helped make chicken soup, and I made pumpkin bread out of fresh pumpkin. I must say that I love cooking. It is a lot of fun to search out recipes and experiment. You never know what is gonna happen and that is fun!
I want my 2 hours back October 17, 2006
I went to see the Grudge 2 on Friday. I know, I know, BIG mistake. Worst movie ever! I kinda knew it would be bad, but I wanted to do something in the spirit of Friday the 13th. My coworkers were buying tickets so I jumped in on it. We went to one of the Sandy theaters which was different for me. They assign seats for movies. I guess that is a good idea for sold out movies, but the down side is that you don’t know who you will be sitting by. Behind us was an annoying group that ran a commentary throughout the movie including quite a few choice words. In that situation there is nothing you can do except have a sense of humor and make fun of the movie while ignoring the crazy people behind ya. What I wasn’t prepared for was the questions from coworkers on Monday. They wanted to know who came with me and why I didn’t introduce him. Well, he is a good friend and in a movie is not exactly the place to be making introductions. I got razzed by my coworkers anyways. Why is that people don’t believe that a guy and girl can just be friends? I have always had a lot of guy friends with no romance whatsoever. It’s like having brothers with you everywhere you go. It’s nice, I really enjoy it. I grew up with brothers, so this is what makes me comfortable. But I guess I will always have to deal with people thinking there is more to the friendship than what there really is. *sigh*
Nothing really new October 13, 2006
No news yet on the temp job. I contacted the recruiter, so hopefully I will get a call back on the Oregon job. They are being a bit snippy about me not being registered yet, but I will be registered in one specialty by the end of this month. And I figure once I actually talk to someone I can win them over. I have the experience just not the credentials yet. I’ll work my magic one way or another.
Now that my career path is taking a better turn, I am still struggling with my housing dilemma. I just received a calling in my ward. I’m a stake representative for the Holladay region YSA activities committee. It’s interesting to say the least, and a bit overwhelming. I haven’t been set apart yet, and I am gonna have to sit down with someone and talk about it first. I really want this calling, but I really can’t afford to stay where I am at right now. And I have not been able to find a place still in the ward. It is giving me a headache, and I feel incredibly guilty leaving the ward. But I just don’t see how it is possible for me to find a place in the boundaries. So I may have to decline the calling after all, and I feel dreadful about it. I’m so horrible for flaking out. This sucks.
So on a different note, I am trying to get a few things done before I make a job change. I’ve been in a quite a bit of pain recently. I am taking the homeopathic route of healing, but there are a few other things I need to do. Especially before I lose my medical insurance. I am struggling to make a gyno appointment. Timing is bad for one reason, and another is just plain fear. I was hurt terribly during one of my last appointments. I fainted after the doctor did the exam. And I have a high threshold for pain. So I am petrified at the thought of that happening again. I really hope I can get over this fear. It has been over 5 years since my last exam and that makes me way over due. How can I face the women I exam if I myself am not willing to do the same exams they go through? I am gathering my courage. I will do this. I must.
the time is drawing near October 10, 2006
Today I was given information for a traveling agency that does Ultrasound assignments 4 weeks at a time. And the first assignment I may take is in Oregon. I am really excited about this. I will be contacting them this week to see if I can go soon or if I have to wait till I finish my tests. My hopes are for soon. I will quit my job and leave November if possible. That will free up December for me and I’ll just work one month on and maybe one month off. I am ready to do this. It will be hard to be away from Salt Lake City, but 4 weeks won’t be as bad as the 3 month assignments I was looking into. *sigh* This couldn’t have come at a better time. I have been beyond frustrated and really stressed out. My health is taking a nose dive. So it is time to move on and do what is best for me. My goals for this month are to study and start packing things up for storage. I may even go and get a storage unit as well. It is time to quit complaining and take some major action.
sleepy bunny October 9, 2006
I didn’t get in from Vegas till 3 am. I didn’t sleep a wink the whole drive back. So I went straight to bed. I am pretty sure I set my alarm. So Iwake up to what I thought was my alarm, but it was my phone. I thought I was having a dream. I couldn’t understand why my phone was making such a weird noise so I picked it up and said hello. Well, it was my supervisor. She asked me if I knew I was supposed to be at altaview today. I replied yes, thinking duh I know that. I hung up and realized I was 45 minutes late for work! I jumped out of bed, threw some clothes on, called the other tech at altaview and then raced to the hospital. So apparently 3 hours of sleep just wasn’t enough for me for once. Ha!
A quick update October 6, 2006
I’m on my way out of town, so I just wanted to touch on the drama before I’m away from the computer. Well, 5 days and 52 hours of work, I am emotional. And going through that tiff at work didn’t help. I never got to talk to my supervisor and she didn’t pull me into the woodshed. So my only hope now is that my coworkers pled my case well enough for her to take pity on me. Now that I’ve had time to breath and think on this situation again, there was nothing I could do and if I am let go because of a strange patient, then so be it. I am ready to leave soon anyways. I am motivated to finish off this last test, and get out. And I think this was a good reminder why. I have experienced both sides. A great place of employment where your supervisor supports you in everything, and a bad place of employment where everything you do is analyzed and criticized to death. I am ready to make some good changes in every aspect of my life. It’s gonna be quite a year for me, a lot of major changes are in store. And I feel really blessed to have such supportive and wonderful friends. I love you all very much. Thank you.